I look at current trends and think, “What a mess!” Trust in institutions and between peoples has eroded badly. The common mythos within many countries – shared identities and sense of purpose – feels more vapor than solid. We’re splintering. Our collective confidence is spongy, like punkwood. Digital platform sharing swamps person-to-person connections. Generalized anxiety, addictions, depression, and suicide are trending up. It’s difficult to see past the global debt challenge, let alone the enemies of the ideals of western civilization.
Reviewing some similar moments in history, I wonder if we’re approaching a response point. Will there be a pendulum swing back the other way? Forces tend to invoke a counterforce.
Will there be a more optimistic, wholistic picture of the future that grips the imagination of people? Will we have leaders who call people to embrace responsibility and adventure in the face of challenges? Will the challenges themselves be great enough to call us to a new kind of greatness?
Are we approaching a fork-in-the-road opportunity space? It can be a moment of faith and hope. On a morning walk earlier this week I strolled by the swamp area near our house and there it was – the first white water lily of the season, gorgeous against the black muck. It felt like a signpost.
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One of my favorite ‘grumpy’ friends grows more irritated when I recommend we choose optimism. “We’re going to suffer!” he says.
The older I get the more I savor the book of Job in the Bible. When I was in my 30’s I would think “this whole suffering situation is so unfair, and Job’s friends (plus the younger man Elihu) just go on and on (and on), can’t we get to the end, please!” With more life experience I’ve grasped something about suffering, and get more from Job.
People who think they have some “right” to expect a particular life – especially naïve views of freedom — will be heartbroken, maybe go mad. Everyone suffers, to some degree, to fulfill our calling and learn what we need to learn. I’ve witnessed many people flee one uncomfortable situation where they needed to learn something deep, only to find themselves in the next situation where they’re still forced to learn it. I should be clear, too, that the suffering that many of us experience is a teeny fraction of what others will bear.
Some of this suffering can be alleviated by good teachers, mentors, and fathers. (Mom has a complementary but equally important role.) But there will still be suffering that you can’t control and can’t make go away. That’s when you need friends who say, “I’m not going anywhere.” You also learn to distrust and ignore the ‘guru’ who claims to have an instant, pain-free solution for you.
There is a connection between this and the value of doing hard things. I’m still mulling this over so it’s clearer in my mind. In some way, doing hard things creates a feedback loop that surfaces meaning in our struggles.
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What are you intentionally NOT doing?
From one of my mentors: “What you do NOT do is often far more important than what you DO. Because if you’re not ignoring most things, you’ll never do the things that are most important.”
Something I’m trying out (and it’s uncomfortable): Don’t check the news or social media until my work is done. Willfully ignore it. I can’t DO anything about most of the events reported in the news. If something is important there are people in my life who surface it to me. Partial success so far, but I can sense the benefits.
This kind of practice helps us overcome FOMO (fear of missing out). We need this strength to seek adventures and challenges. The real world is more soul-satisfying.
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My ‘grumpy’ friend frequently states his frustration with what he calls ‘low IQ elites drunk on bureaucratic power.’ “It’s completely unfair in a democratic republic,” he says.
We like to think that majorities run the world but it isn’t true. Minority views generally do. This is 80/20 applied to human power dynamics.
A tell: when a minority view uses all the tools at their disposal to appear to be the majority, or at least intimidate anyone who would dare to disagree.
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I pull this out periodically and review it. Perhaps you need a list like this?
What is my why?
Physically strong to care for family members
Lean, fit for longer healthier life – which prolongs contribution
Prayer and meditation, intercession
Understand patterns of events to anticipate troubles and guide others to thriving
Study and Intellectual stimulation
Courage
Wisdom
Aim: Be a large, clean conduit of God’s goodness to flow to people He puts in my sphere of influence.
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Viktor Frankel is still correct: We retain our power to choose, even amidst dreadful circumstances. My imagination often creates fearful situations. My Master says, “Fear Me above all, and trust in Me.” I can also imagine positive events in the future. I’m choosing to go with them, convinced the view out the windshield is forever larger than the rear-view mirror.
